Why Self-Care is Critical for Supporting LGBTQ+ Clients

Caring for yourself is not new to the helping profession. In fact, self-care is not only ethical, but also a necessary clinical practice to maintain efficacy within our work. While this is pertinent in working with any population, LGBTQ+ communities face many risk factors making it even more essential for clinicians to be mindful of self-care practices. 

According to The Trevor Project’s “National Survey on LGBTQ Youth Mental Health” (2021), almost half of the youth who identify as LGBTQ considered suicide within the previous year. The research indicates that 70% of LGBTQ youth stated their mental health was poor most of the time or always during COVID-19. Contributing risk factors include: discrimination, politics, social media, non-supportive home—and most shocking to write—conversion therapies. 

How to Support Yourself & LGBTQ+ Clients

As we know, these challenges and risks affect vulnerable individuals across the lifespan. This makes the work as a clinician heavy—especially if, as a clinician, you identify as a member of the LGBTQ+ community. Here are tips on how to support yourself, in and out of session, when working with members of the LGBTQ+ community. 

Acknowledge your feelings & reactions.

In my practice, I work with a lot of therapists who often need a gentle reminder that it’s okay to have personal reactions and need support themselves. Part of the work as a therapist is identifying our own feelings, biases, and emotional responses. Having reactions is expected, knowing what needs tending is the work. 

Be in the moment.

It’s typical to connect for us as therapists with our clients on a deeply empathic level. As a result, it’s common to experience bodily sensations during the session. Take a moment to notice if your body is tense. Acknowledge this feeling and release, allowing your parasympathetic nervous system to regain control. This allows for you to continue to model regulation for your client on an energetic level, and can be used as a micro-intervention for you to practice self-care.

Consider appropriate self-disclosure.

If it fits within your framework, using self-disclosure to strengthen the therapeutic bond can also honor the intersections between you and your client. It’s okay to self-disclose when appropriate. Consider a session with a client who is experiencing extreme negative emotions related to LGBTQ+ legislation that’s causing a fear response. While you’re validating the client’s response, it’s okay to acknowledge the intersections between you and the client at the same time. 

An example of this kind of reflection could be, “I hear you’re feeling fearful of what the future holds for our community, and I share your concerns. However, I’m curious to hear more about how this is impacting your wellbeing.” 

By disclosing your felt-sense, it may help the client feel seen while simultaneously sending the message of You are not alone—to both of you. 

Disconnect.

Disconnecting can be just as relevant as connecting. Give yourself permission to leave your work at work. This could be your client’s emotional world, your reaction to your clients, and your own fears related to LGBTQ+ outcomes. 

While it’s a privilege to step away from the news, remember that you’re human and your role as a therapist requires a unique relationship with the media. You consume it for yourself, which requires the processing of your own emotional responses and through the lenses of your client. That’s a lot of work. 

Taking intentional time to play, or disconnect, gives your brain the ability to work on processing complex information and feelings while not actively thinking about it. 

Process with your therapist. 

Having a therapist to process your emotions can be extremely beneficial in preventing burnout or secondary traumatic responses. Remember, you’re a part of a bigger community and deserve a safe place to feel held just as much as your clients do. 

As a practice owner who identifies as part of—and works with—the LGBTQ+ community, I know how difficult it can be to honor what comes up during a session, while holding space for my clients. As much heartache and anger that surfaces, there is just as much, if not more, power, freedom, and love that is associated with our community. 

Your client came to you, on some level, to seek regulation and grounding. While we respond to the needs of the client, you’re also fostering a human connection. The therapeutic relationship is different from all others, and the human element is the foundation. Meaning, you’re half of that dynamic and you deserve care, too. Showing up for yourself is showing up for your client.