Breakup therapy worksheets

Are you a therapist looking for breakup therapy worksheets? You’re in the right place. This article provides an overview of common feelings during a breakup and coping strategies to suggest to clients.

We’ve included a free downloadable relationship breakup worksheet PDF to save to your electronic health record (EHR) and use in your practice.

What are common feelings during a breakup?

Breakups can be very painful, even for the person who ended the relationship. A 2011 literature review suggests that a breakup can trigger grief reactions similar to those that follow the death of a loved one.

Common feelings and experiences during a breakup can include:

• Feelings of sadness and hopelessness

• Grieving the loss of the relationship and their future

• Shock, confusion, or despair, especially when it is an unexpected breakup

• Overanalyzing the relationship and questioning the breakup, such as wondering what they did wrong

• Difficulty concentrating

• Changes in appetite

• Changes in sleep

• Social withdrawal

• Feeling anxious

• Avoiding feelings through substance use, increased scrolling on social media, or impulsive sexual behavior

• Blame, anger, and resentment

• Feeling down or depressed

• Jealousy or suspicion that the other person may be seeing someone else

• Internalizing the breakup by thinking there is something wrong with them and reactivating negative core beliefs, like being unlovable

• Suicidal thoughts

• Bargaining to get back together or compromising on needs and values to stay in the relationship

These feelings can be intense and disorienting, especially in clients with insecure attachment histories. A 2024 study of emerging adults found that attachment insecurity before a breakup was linked to higher depressive and anxiety symptoms afterward.

Therapy can be beneficial in navigating these intense feelings, processing the loss of the relationship, and helping clients focus on meeting their needs and caring for themselves while healing from the breakup. Breakup therapy worksheets give clients a structured way to name their feelings between sessions.

If a client is having thoughts of suicide, they can call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, which is free and available 24/7.

What are some breakup coping strategies for clients?

Therapy worksheets for breakups can introduce several ways to cope with the loss of a relationship. Strategies to suggest to clients include:

• Journaling can be helpful to make sense of feelings and thoughts related to the breakup and the relationship. It may be beneficial to reflect on what worked, what didn’t, and consider any misalignment in values, lessons learned, as well as unhelpful patterns in the relationship. Understanding why a relationship ended was linked to fewer internalizing symptoms in a study of 160 young adults.

• Talking about feelings with friends, family, trusted people, and a therapist can help clients process the breakup. Clients may hear other people’s reflections on the relationship that they may not have wanted to hear earlier, which could provide a different perspective.

• Encourage clients to prioritize self-care by meeting their basic needs, such as eating regular meals, drinking plenty of water, getting enough sleep, checking in with friends and family daily, moving their body, and sticking to a routine. Clients can also pamper themselves with a massage, haircut, or pedicure.

• When possible, suggest that clients abstain from contacting their ex for about a month, as counseling centers at Kansas State University and the University of Alberta recommend, and practice enforcing boundaries.

• Clients can make a list of all their qualities and what they bring to a relationship to boost their self-esteem and avoid blaming themselves for the breakup.

• Therapy can help clients strengthen their coping skills, like learning distress tolerance skills and healthy ways to regulate emotions.

• Encourage clients to refocus on their goals and what’s essential in their lives.

• Clients can use therapy to identify any attachment patterns that came up for them in the relationship and work on developing secure attachment with themselves.

• Help clients avoid unhealthy coping strategies like scrolling on their phone all day, looking at their ex’s social media, drinking or using substances, or jumping into another relationship.

‌

How do you use the breakup therapy worksheets?

You can download and use the breakup worksheets in several ways:

• Use the breakup therapy worksheets to provide psychoeducation about the importance of self-care strategies during relationship breakups.

• Email the relationship breakup worksheet PDF to clients after the session.

• Ask the client to reflect on the worksheet and complete the reflection questions between sessions and report their insights at their next therapy appointment.

• Use the reflection prompts in group therapy sessions to encourage clients to share more about how they’ve handled breakups with other participants.

• Combine this relationship breakup worksheet PDF with other relational worksheets, such as our 10 green flags in a relationship, conflict resolution worksheets, assertive communication examples, “I statements” worksheet, and boundaries exploration worksheet.

• Share the worksheet with coworkers or leave copies in your office.

• Use this worksheet to provide training to interns or supervisees on therapy for breakups.

Sources

• Field, T. (2011). Romantic breakups, heartbreak and bereavement. Psychology.

• Gehl, K., Brassard, A., Dugal, C., Lefebvre, A.-A., Daigneault, I., et al. (2024). Attachment and breakup distress: The mediating role of coping strategies. Emerging Adulthood.

• Kansas State University Counseling and Psychological Services. (n.d.). Breakup bootcamp workbook.

• Kansky, J., & Allen, J. P. (2018). Making sense and moving on: The potential for individual and interpersonal growth following emerging adult breakups. Emerging Adulthood.

• Maertz, K. (n.d.). Surviving a relationship breakup: Top 20 strategies. University of Alberta.

How SimplePractice streamlines running your practice

SimplePractice is HIPAA-compliant practice management software with everything you need to run your practice built into the platform—from booking and scheduling to insurance and client billing.

If you’ve been considering switching to an EHR system, SimplePractice empowers you to run a fully paperless practice—so you get more time for the things that matter most to you.
Try SimplePractice free for 30 days. No credit card required.

‌